Leslie Leyland Fields

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This Christmas, 3 Things to Give When You Have Little to Give


Do you feel a bit bereft of Christmas Spirit this year? Or—-just wondering what you can give that would be meaningful? I know.

Christmas seems doubly hard this year. In this season of giving, what if you have little to give?

 What if you're mourning the death of someone you loved?

What if you lost your job?

What if you have to be alone?

What if you’re depressed?

What if you cannot buy gifts this year?


You are not alone. There are SO many struggling this year.

And even if you’re on the other end, if you’re a Christmas magician and a godly fairy-mother, this is for you, too. Because

These are three things we all NEED this season, and these are three things we can all GIVE this season:

 

  1. *Give the truth.

Last night a dear friend called and asked how I was. "Kinda lousy, actually," I told her. I told her why. I told her about not sleeping, about the rain and the dark, the headaches, the uncertainty, the season. I had to say it. It costs too much to pretend. She heard me and spoke back. I was not alone.

 I'm not telling you to cry on every shoulder you see. I'm not telling you to wallow in self-pity. But allow yourself to speak the truth of your struggle to your nearest friends. Pema Chodron writes, "How did I get so lucky to have my heart awakened to others and their suffering?" Let trustworthy hearts be awakened. Truth in all its forms is a gift. Friendships don’t survive without it.

 

2. *Give Stories

No matter how old they are, tell your children stories of when they were young. Let them love the stranger who is their younger self and let them see your love for her too. Tell your own growing-up stories---about Christmas, about school, the memories that make you laugh. Without family stories, we are exiles in the present, marooned without context, without history. Even sad stories can contain beauty and comfort. Pass it on. When there is only silence about the past, we wander, homeless searching for somewhere to belong.

Giving your children a heritage is giving them a home.

3. *Give Generous Words Generously

No matter your bank account, no matter if you live in a travel trailer at an RV park or a mansion on the mountains, you possess something priceless: the power and the ability to speak dead hearts and relationsips back to life.  You know the words you have waited your whole life to hear, words that mean you matter? Don’t waste any more energy. Recognize they cannot give you what they themselves do not posses. But YOU are different! Don't make anyone wait as you have had to wait. Tell them now, by letter, by phone, by email, by zoom, by Christmas card:

"I love you."  

"You're amazing."  

"You're such a good father."  

"You're an incredible son."

 "I'm sorry." 

"You're the most caring person I know."

"You're so beautiful: outside-in and everywhere."

"I'm so proud of you."

"I forgive you. Will you forgive me?"

 "I'm always here for you."

There’s no greater gift.

*Well, yes there is one gift that’s even greater:

GIVE the reason for the hope that is within you, especially if that hope is Jesus.

When we do these things, we’re doing something that echoes that first Christmas:

we’re giving a touch of Jesus.

What else can we give when we have little to give?

(Friends, just a reminder to mark your calendar for the free January class. Bless your family with your story, their legacy. I’ll show you how. More here:)